Games you will never, ever Platinum

Ah, trophy whoring. While I’ve never obsessed over the fake-but-totally-real little awards packed into games enough to hunt down a copy of the Hannah Montana movie tie-in, I’ll definitely go after platinum trophies if they’re reasonably attainable. A couple of weeks ago I got the platinum trophies for Assassin’s Creed II and Prince of Persia: The Forgotten Sands, with the latter being the easiest of the five I’ve picked up.

There are a few other games I own that I’m on the cusp of getting the platinum for but have given up on. Uncharted: Drake’s Fortune only asks that I beat it on Crushing, but I couldn’t get halfway through without wanting to break something. For Sonic’s Ultimate Genesis Collection, all I have to do is beat Dr. Robotnik’s Mean Bean Machine. However, that would require me to get good at a game I hated as a kid and hate even more now. And as much as I love Red Dead Redemption, I don’t see myself putting another 20 or so hours into the multiplayer to reach the top rank.

However, those are all games that I could one day buckle down and do something about should I ever feel the need to. The games that follow are relentless and will do nothing but mock even the most steel-willed trophy hunter.

So if you plan on playing these games with the intention of getting that platinum, think again.

BioShock 2

This is the most recent game on this list, and also one that not many people played. It’s too bad, because it’s excellent. Not only that, but it hands out most of its trophies like candy. The single-player trophies just ask that you bunker down and beat the game on the hardest difficulty, and even the multiplayer trophies just require you to play all the maps and rank up.

However, that’s where the problem lies: no one plays the multiplayer, and with good reason – it’s tacked on, and you can absolutely tell. No one I know who enjoyed the original game asked for it, but there it is for dozens of people to enjoy. Even when I tried out the multiplayer during the first week the game was out I had trouble finding a match, taking anywhere between 2-10 minutes to find a game.

Buy this game, but not for the multiplayer. Or just buy it at all. C'mon, people!

Buy this game, but not for the multiplayer. Or just buy it at all. C'mon, people!

I suppose you and a handful of really, really determined friends could try to reach rank 40, but the rest of us in the game community will just move right the hell on, if you don’t mind.

Guitar Hero: Metallica / Van Halen / Smash Hits

The Guitar Hero franchise was a bit saturated last year, to say the very least. On top of the (excellent) Guitar Hero 5, there were THREE other GH games released on consoles. There were two key differences between GH5 and these three offshoots: 1) the offshoots were based on the capable but unspectacular World Tour engine to varying success and 2) the platinum for GH5 is attainable, while the others were goddamn impossible.

Readers Comments (49)

  1. VofEscaflowne July 30, 2010 @ 09:39

    I have the WipEout HD platinum 😉 What a freaking awesome game which is why I totally wanted it 😀

    Can’t say much for the other games as most of them I haven’t even played. Street Fighter IV I can see being hard but probably a lot more manageable with an arcade fight stick.

  2. I would say Unreal Tournament 3 and MAG deserve to be on that list. GTA4 is tough, you’re right, but Auf Viedersen Petrovic isn’t the tough one lol. Wanted is. Where you need to be level 10 in online play. That requires you to play Fly the Co-op on hrad to get $4500-$6000 a game in about 3 minutes. You need to play that one about a THOUSAND times to get the cash required for the trophy. That means one of the most time consuming trophies there is. Resistance 2 has a tough one like that for online ranked play.

    MAG, before patch 1.06 came out took me 250hrs to platinum. That wasn’t my goal, I just loved the game. You have to love certain games to get the platinum. UT3 is another tough one. Prolly takes as long as GTA4 and MAG.

    SF4 is prolly one of the toughest there is though. I saw the list and said I hate fighting games, not even going to try this one.

  3. You should add Far Cry 2 to the list, which is probably literally impossible to get the platinum for.

    There’s a multiplayer trophy in FC2 that requires you to earn enough XP to reach the highest rank in the game. I think if you do the math, it would take around 3 years of straight playing the multiplayer every single day in order to reach that high of a rank.

  4. Don’t platinum games unless they are something incredibly special and I have an interest in actually getting each trophy. So can’t really say much on this subject other than trophies and platinum ones. The only game I ever got a platinum is God of War 3. To me, that says something. It is my first and only game so far and I pretty much played all the major releases since the beginning. Came close, but never wanted to get the hardest one cause it didn’t feel worth it to me.

  5. Noooo UT3 wasn’t very hard, just alot of grinding to do, and you can “cheat”, I guess and get the trophy for 200 kills on 50 different days by changing the date in the ps3 lol and the online matches you need to win can be private rooms full of bots, so it only took me about 20-30 hours of game time, but not very hard in the end really.

  6. What No Ninja Gaiden that is the only game that no one could platnum 😛

  7. I disagree with bioshock 2 .. i played it very thoroughly and i know theres a decent number who still do .. especially the multiplayer

  8. TraumaticTighearnan July 30, 2010 @ 10:22

    What about Heavy Rain?
    The amount of time and dedication put into seeing every single ending would be simply tormenting..
    >_<

  9. Droccafeller July 30, 2010 @ 10:33

    You Forgot Killzone 2 with its top 1% for the week trophy.

  10. @Vof — Remind me never to play against you in WipEout, lol.

    @joostin — I played UT3, but got rid of it before the trophy patch. And I’ve never played MAG.

    @Lambert — Wish I’d remembered Far Cry 2. That game is broken on so many levels that it’s not even funny.

    @SonyJunkie — ‘Grats, I could never platinum any of the GoW games. 🙁

    @MechSamus — Changing the date?? Witchery!

    @ZoroSama — I feel dumb for not remembering a game as ball-busting as Ninja Gaiden. D’oh!

    @Deathslizer — My matchmaking claim above wasn’t an exaggeration — I honestly think I spent as much time looking for matches as I did playing them. I never went back. =/

    @Traumatic — There are guides for seeing every ending and getting every trophy, but I’ve actually yet to play it.

    @Droccafeller — Well, I managed to get into the 10% one week, and I’m not very good. 😉

  11. warhawk. what do i win?

  12. Unreal Tournament 3 platinum isn’t hard because you can boost near enough every trophy using bots. The only real hard trophy on the game is defeating Akasha on insane mode. I’ve done that but can’t be bothered going for the platinum as it gets boring after a while.

    GTA IV platinum has become easier to obtain now because there is a money glitch where you get 300k after 3 hours worth of playing or something so it’s easier to reach the highest rank now. Don’t quite know all the details but search the internet & you’ll find out what I mean.

    You should have added Tom Clancy’s Endwar to the list though because that platinum is impossible to platinum. Nobody in the world has obtained it (see for yourself on ps3trophyguide.com) as I believe one of the trophies is glitched and the same goes for NBA 2K10 with one of the trophies being glitched on that.

    Mortal Kombat vs DC Universe and God of War 3 were pretty tough platinums in my opinion. Took some sheer dedication and lots of RAGE until I got them! 😛

  13. it’s Wipeout HD, not WIpOut HD

  14. @matt — You win your words being on the internet. Wee!

    @Deak-in — I wish I’d known of that site’s existence before writing this. *womp womp*

    @doa766 — Who exactly are you talking to?

  15. you must mention Warhawk, and Fight Night Round 4

  16. Bioshock 2 was pretty challenging but I managed to obtain the platinum. The Single player trophies weren’t that hard and the Multiplayer trophies were just time consuming. The multiplayer wasn’t that bad but I knew eventually it would turn in to a ghost town so I played it non stop for 5 days until i reached level 40. Everytime I went back to play more multiplayer on psn there was tons of people playing capture the sister and the better modes.

  17. First I want to say that this was incredibly well written so good job. As far as platinums go I think I have four and as a lot of people pointed out, it’s best to just go for them on the games you love to play. I have several games that I know I will never plat just because they are so time consuming to do so, especially JPRG’s, anything by NIS is probably incredibly difficult to obtain, Star Ocean 4, White Knight Chronicles, etc, are all very long roads to platinum. But this articles raises a good point about trophies (and the same could be said for achievements I suppose) and that’s the inclusion of MP trophies that you would more than likely have to obtain within days of release. I think it would be better for them to not be included to achieve a platinum because if you are late to the purchase than you will likely never be able to 100% the trophies. One of the best things about Uncharted 2’s trophies is the two MP trophies are just a matter of beating one match for each. I only have about three left to plat UC2 and I imagine that crushing mode will piss me off as much as doing it on UC1 but I love the game so I have no issues with achieving it. You should do another article for the most time consuming platinums because that would be an interesting list.

  18. I have 2 of those platinums. Ghostbusters was a cakewalk overall.

  19. WKC, who the hell wants to put 600+ hours into that game.

  20. Warhawk hands down.

    You have to play for over 1,000 hours to get to the last rank (General), which is a must to achieve the platinum trophie.

    Killzone 2 has some troublkesome moments too, especially when trying to beat the campaing in elite mode. The 1% is not that hard if you decide to invest some time in the online play for the week.

    But yeah, nothing compares to warhawk xD

  21. White Knight Chronicles is probably one of the most time consuming plats ever, I heard it takes about 1000h and it’s logical considering how much stuff you have to collect and so on.
    I’m going to plat Demon’s Souls cause I love to play it and I’ve put almost 100 hours into the game so far. I can imagine it will take at least 50 more until I plat it.

  22. Just to troll: Metal Gear Solid 4 lol

    ~d

  23. I have to disagree with Ghostbusters. Since the game dropped to $20, there’s been an influx of new players. “Overachiever” isn’t hard to get if you just keep playing. It’s “Gozer’s Most Wanted” that’s a pain b/c the servers don’t always register that you won a match. I had to go through the checklist 2.5 times to finally get the trophy.

  24. Fear 2 should be there if no one already mentioned it..

  25. James Harris July 30, 2010 @ 14:53

    Totally Right About The Ghostbuster And GTA 4 Platinums. Online Trophies Are Impossible

  26. @TraumaticTighearnan

    No, I got the Heavy Rain Platinum. It took quite a long time, I’m rather pleased with that one. Have a total of 8 in all and getting the Red Dead Redemption Platinum sometime this weekend easily.

  27. how about LOTR: Conquest? Bought it cheap the other day, finished all the single player and went to play online but theyve taken the server down so now I cant get any online trophies…..so thats impossible to plat now!

  28. Definitely Ninja Gaiden Sigma 2. I still don’t think a single person has the platinum trophy for that game, and I don’t think anyone will ever get it. It requires you to beat 5 missions, each of which are TEAM missions, and each of which are completely f**ing impossible.

    Last time I checked, which was around 6-8 months after the games release, 2 of the missions had STILL never been beaten, and most of the experts on forums agreed that they probably never would. I actually checked a few months later just to see what happened, and one of them had been beaten ONCE, and the other had still never been beaten. You can look at the leaderboards to see current progress.

    Anyway, it will likely never be platinumed, and even if it does, it’s a safe bet that whoever does it will be asian.

    Another one that sucks to platinum is Red Dead Redemption. I don’t mind 5-6 really hard grinding trophies, but RDR has like 10-12. Waste of time, and this is from someone who really goes out of his way to get platinums.

  29. Fight Night Round 4 i got every trophy in that game except for one, which required you to fucking rank number 1 in the world???? wtf thats impossible

  30. I never go for Trophies OR Achievements anymore. Too much trouble. The closest I got to a Platinum was in God of War.

    I like the list though. It’s kinda lousy when a developer makes trophies for a multiplayer they themselves know won’t excel in terms of people coming back for it. That’s one of the things I like about Infinity Ward and Treyarch: while they could get away with adding multiplayer Trophies/Achievements (since there are a ton of people playing their multiplayer), they don’t because they know that not everyone can play multiplayer.

  31. dude you are Wipeout trophies are friggin impossible, i gave and just enjoy the game every now and then rather then pull my hair out

  32. PSN=Bounkass July 30, 2010 @ 16:25

    LOL! Hahahah! You DON’T need to get the “Auf Wedersehen Petrovic” trophy in one sitting… That’s bollocks. I did the “Auf Wedersehen Petrovic” and platinum’d GTAIV. Thought it’s not hard, just time consuming… Add my PSN for proof.

  33. Bigdickbandit July 30, 2010 @ 16:31

    easiest platinums i got were in borderlands and MW2.

  34. Ginger-Reiki July 30, 2010 @ 18:38

    Ginger-Reiki enters the room, Holds aloft his Warhawk platinum…. and the divorce papers to prove it.
    I was lucky my wife was busy studying for a year when I manage to platinum it.

  35. Ginger-Reiki. . . . . . I salute you!.

  36. fear 2 is impossible cause there is no online community

  37. SonicRiderZG8 July 30, 2010 @ 19:47

    Pain. Nuff said.

  38. @PSN=Bounkass: The AWP trophy glitch does exist but not everybody encounters it.

    I’ve given up on GTA IV and Killzone 2. I don’t really have any hard plats but I’m close on games like Mirrors Egde, GOW3 and more.

  39. StarvedSanity July 30, 2010 @ 23:54

    i got Killzone 2 Platinum to go with my 8 others. KZ2 just takes determination. haven’t Platted any of these games though. i would say Assault on Dark Athena is impossible. that game has lots of online trophies and the online is so awful nobody plays it. one even requires 10,000 killls!! what a joke!!

  40. I have 6 plats, MK vs DC took me one week but it was HARD, I mean I think back to the stress those kombo challenges caused me and I can still hear myself talking to the tv.
    Technically my quickest platinum but oh man oh man, I’ll never forget it

  41. Reneid Klein July 31, 2010 @ 00:59

    I can’t possibly see anyone getting a Plat in Star Ocean 4. I’m not sure if anyone mentioned it already or not, but that game just asks for stupidly difficult trophies.

  42. demons souls nuff said

  43. PSN=Bounkass July 31, 2010 @ 02:55

    @halfdeaf: Oh, so the glitch enables you to do it in more sittings? That’s weird.

  44. Since when did GTA IV require you to complete it in a single playthrough? I helped a friend get the ‘Petrovic’ trophy over a couple of weeks and I’ve almost got it myself.

  45. im sure a loot of people hawe platinum for killzone2 cuz i can uderstand being addicted to the game, howewer to get a platinum at killzone2 you must beat this hardcore game on hard, and beat it once on any dificulty without dieing

  46. @Reigen:

    Yeah, but the difficult part is beating the campaign on elite difficulty. Everything else is just a matter of putting some time on the task.

    I still mantain that warhawk is the most difficult platinum trophie to obtain (which means to actually get, not like the ones some people mentioned that are “impossible” to obtain due to bad online implementation).

    I mean, it took my brother some 920 hours just to get to general (I have about 600 hours, still pretty far from general) and not to mention all the medals you have to achieve.

    You either just play warhawk ’till you get the platinum without ever looking at another games or just stopped playing the game at all.

    BTW, I love this article =)

  47. VofEscaflowne July 31, 2010 @ 12:47

    @Dreamer_Lion

    I haven’t played Warhawk but having a game require you to invest 920 hours in it just to achieve part of a platinum is insane. In my opinion, it doesn’t really make it difficult to achieve… unless if the objectives in question are actually difficult, but it just seems like it’s a matter of investing a huge amount of time doing the same tasks over and over (which I assume this is what it is). I hate games that do that and I will never bother with these trophies no matter how much I love the game.

    WipEout HD was difficult because it actually had some insane tasks to achieve. It doesn’t necessarily need you to quit your job and ditch any form of social life you may have to achieve but it is still hard. There’s no “eliminate 1,000,000 online opponents” of the sort, it’s just pure racing skills put to the most extreme tests. These are the challenges I enjoy in games.

  48. @VofE:

    Well yeah, kind of. Warhawk is a multiplayer only game, so you spend all of your time playing against other players.

    Then as you play you earn points, which in turn make you “level up” in ranks. But Warhawk is a goddamn hard game, so you make 200 points per game (30 mins matches) when your team wins and a 100 when you are on the losing side (assuming you played really well).

    It takes 275,000 points to get to general. You can do the math, lol xD

    And yeah, I like games that are “hard” on the trophies but not time consuming. For instance, killzone 2 is a pain in the ass to plat but it never requires you to spend insane amounts of time doing anything.

  49. I have “The Gold Standard” in SF4. But back then I didn’t know you could do a double charge to remember supers and I never completed any of the charge character’s trials on normal! Thing that sucks is I can’t go back and do it know because that PS3 YLOD’d with the data on it 😀

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